Can We Please Get Some Action?
by starrynight95
Summary: Sometimes the most innocent words can sound dirty. "'Can we please get some action' I groaned" A cute one-shot about how some things can have double meanings...


BPOV:

"Why do we have to watch this stupid movie anyway," I complained as Edward drove me home.

For our history class, our teacher has assigned us to watch the 1960 movie Spartacus. I didn't want to have to watch it. First, I don't like action movies. Too much chaos.

Second, it was an old movie, which was sure to mean over-dramatized, and quite frankly bad, acting, music, and effects. Not to mention the so called 'love scenes' they have in old movies look more awkward than romantic.

Edward chuckled and I stifled a smile at the lovely bell sound.

"Bella, you're acting like he's torturing you. It's just a movie. 2 hours long at most."

I sighed, but conceded to the point. But I still didn't like it.

Edward pulled into the driveway and got out before swiftly moving to open my door. I still couldn't help smile at the sweet gesture. He grabbed my bag and brought it to my room for me.

By the time he got back I was sullenly eating a sandwich. I looked at his face carefully, noticing a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"You already got the movie didn't you," I groaned.

He smirked before nodding, not even bothering to look contrite.

"Edward!"

"Come on, Bella. It will be over before you know it," he tried to comfort me.

I huffed, knowing I was being ridiculous. But I really didn't want to have to suffer through the boredom of a terrible movie.

"Fine," I said, getting a triumphant smile from Edward.

He grabbed my hand and pulled me into the living room. I sat on the couch while he kneeled in front on the TV to put in the movie. I am unashamed to admit that shamelessly stared at his muscled back and –blush-perfect butt before he stood back up.

As soon as he turned to look at me, I blushed deep red and tried to shake myself out of the Edward-induced haze.

"What?" he asked, looking adorably puzzled.

"Nothing," I quickly said, hoping he wouldn't press me for more.

He looked at me curiously before smirking.

"Miss Swan, were you staring at my butt?" he said, arching one brow.

"No!" I said defiantly, though the my dark blush ruined the effect of my denial.

He merely chuckled and sat down beside me, putting his arm around my shoulder and tucking me into his chest.

I leaned my head against his shoulder, thinking I would be content with the awful movie as long as he sat with me.

Then it started.

Within the first five minutes I began a string of complaints and picked at everything about the movie. **(AN: Just so you know you don't have to have seen the movie, even if the final part of the story involves a scene from it. I recommend you never do watch it because it's truly awful)**

"Did they seriously just say that? 'I like you. I want you to like me' it sounds like Barney, not gladiator training."

"Did this guy ever take acting lessons? He sucks"

"Those are the worst effects I've ever seen."

"If this was considered a good movie at the time, I would hate to see what a bad movie would be."

It went on and one, the constant remarks were the only thing that kept me halfway interested.

Edward was laughing silently beside be. I could feel the vibrations from his chest as he chuckled at yet another comment.

"Why do they have this constant crappy music? I can't even hear what they're saying." **(AN: The music really was crappy)**

At some point they decided it would be a good idea to have half an hour of useless conversation you couldn't even hear.

I was so bored.

I vaguely noticed that the scene with a man relaxing in a large tub, with his servant standing behind him-also in the tub- massaged his soldiers.

This was torturously boring.

Finally I was willing to deal with the horribly done fight scenes that didn't look remotely real than listen to another dull conversation.

"Come on! Could we please get some action!" I groaned.

Then I froze, realizing the double meaning. _Two barely dressed men in a tub together. Massaging. Get some action._

Oh my goodness! That sounded so dirty. I sooo didn't mean that!

I clapped a hand over my mouth, absolutely shocked about how bad the innocent words sounded.

Edward was frozen beside me. Finally, I looked at his face with a dark blush coating my cheeks.

His gold eyes danced with mirth and his perfect lips were pressed together in effort to keep the laughter in.

My shocked expression must have been enough to push him over the edge.

He burst out into musical guffaws, bending over from the force of his laughter.

At the sound of his laugh, the shock wore off and I started laughing as well.

By the time we both calmed down-a good 15 minutes later I might add- tears were streaming down my face.

"Bella, you dirty girl!" said Edward jokingly through the last of his chuckles.

I blushed.

* * *

**AN-This actually happened to me, but I didn't have the pleasure of having it happen in private. It happened right in the middle of my class. Talk about embarrassing! But it was funny. :)**


End file.
